The Stranger!

Long before I was born, my Dad met a stranger who was new to our small town. From the beginning, Dad was fascinated with this enchanting newcomer, and soon invited him to live with our family. As I grew up I never questioned why he was there. The stranger was our Storyteller. He could weave the most fascinating tales. Adventures, mysteries, and comedies were daily conversations. He could hold our whole Family spellbound for hours each evening. If I wanted to know about politics, history, or science, he knew it all. The pictures he could draw were so lifelike, that I would often laugh or cry as I watched and listened. He was like a friend to the whole Family. He took us to our first Major League ball game. The Stranger was an incessant talker. Dad didn't seem to mind, but sometimes Mom would quietly get up while the rest of us were enthralled with one of his stories of faraway places. She'd go to her room and pray, I suppose. You see, my Dad ruled our household with certain moral convictions, but this Stranger never felt obligated to Honor them. Profanity, for example, was not allowed in our house, not from us, our friends, or adults. Our longtime visitor, however, used occasional four letter words that burned my ears and made Dad squirm. To my knowledge the Stranger was never confronted. Even though Dad didn't approve of alcohol, the Stranger felt like we needed exposure and enlightened us to other ways of life. He offered us beer almost everyday. He made cigarettes look tasty; He talked freely about sex. His comments were sometimes blatant, sometimes suggestive, and generally embarrassing. The Stranger began to discuss personal issues and ailments without regard to the tender ears that might be listening or the fact that it was at mealtime-some of the topics caused Mom to leave the table. As I look back, I believe it was by the grace of God that the Stranger did not influence us more. Time after time he opposed the values of my parents. Yet he was seldom rebuked and never asked to leave. Many years have passed since the Stranger moved in with our Family. He is not nearly as intriguing to my Dad as he was in those early years. But if you and I were to walk into my parent's den today, you would see him standing prominently in the center of the main wall, waiting for someone to listen to him talk. He never told us his name-we always used his initials: T.V. Shared By Terri Brady at The TEAM Mona Vie Major in Louisville, Kentucky June 2009.Over the last few months Tone and I have looked at our lives and have done a little re-adjusting, if you will! Our Dreams have become more apparent now than ever before. We have reached a sense of Humility and have decided that our thinking must change in order to obtain our Long Term Vision and Dreams. When I say Long Term Vision and Dreams, maybe that makes you feel a little uncomfortable, but in respects to what we desire and Dream for our family and those that we love (all of you) we are willing to Dream what may seem to be the most impossible Dream in order to have the determination to achieve it. Because with out The Dream how will you ever achieve it.

A very important Dream that we have is in regards to our children. The last few months we have done some serious reflecting on the last 5 years. When someone asked us where we thought we would be in the next 5 years our thoughts and answers were...Jaw on floor, drooling, with the mind blowing thought of..."Awe Crap, we will be in the same position if we don't do something about it." When Elijah was just a few weeks old I remember looking at our kids, dreaming of all the things they deserve in their lives. As quick as one can Dream, reality can set in just as quick and steal that Dream away. I thought to myself how will we ever be able to provide those Dreams for our children if we don't do something different.

And then we found the greatedst thing that has ever happened to us! Or it found us by the grace of our Heavenly Father! TEAM!!!

Now back to the T.V. As we have read books and listened to CD's our minds have opened up and our thinking has changed and have decided that the T.V. must go. I cannot believe that we ever thought of the T.V. to be the greatest babysitter! Convenient...Maybe, but in the long run has a huge potential in keeping anyone from achieving any Dream that they may have, especially for our children. As the story above says the T.V. brings things into a home that can destroy the young minds in which we should be fighting so hard for, it can destroy the quality time of a Family, which in turn can destroy a Family. Look at it this way, Mom and Dad have a T.V. in their room, each child now their very own T.V. in their rooms, the kitchen has it's own personal T.V. and now we put T.V.'s in the bathroom. What happened to the book?? I am pretty sure the book has not grown legs and walked off to watch T.V. itself! How can a Family be a unified whole and grow together when they are all in seperate rooms. Families fall apart everyday and you have to wonder why?? "A Family Team works together in Unity, knowing it requires Hard Work, Patience, and Huge Doses of Love!" How does that work when we value the T.V. more than our family?

We have been talking about less T.V. in our home for the last month or so. A few weeks ago we had the amazing opportunity of spending an evening with our TEAM and our incredible Mentors, Chris and Terri Brady. The story from above was shared by Terri at our TEAMS Major Function in Louisville, Kentucky. I was not able to go but Tone did and came home telling me about the story she read. At first when he was telling me about it in my mind I was thinking..."Well why in the world did her Mother or Father not kick the Man out of the house, Helloooo???" Then when Tone got to the end of the story my thought was..."Open mouth...Insert Foot!!!" Wow, my eyes were wide open and I was speachless! And we realized that if we didn't do something that was going to be our family. To be perfectly honest, IT ALREADY WAS!!! But why did something so simple as eliminating T.V. leave us somewhat fearfull? Were we really that LAZY to not be able to come up with an alternative that would benefit our children? Did we not LOVE our babies enough to do whatever it takes to bring them up the right way in a world that is fighting against them? What was it? As I talked with Terri that evening the lights went on and my fear or utter laziness was gone.

The experiment...I woke up, prayed for strength and went downstairs with our boys! I didn't go to the remote like usual. I went straight to the kitchen to make the kids breakfast. As soon as Zion asked to watch T.V. I said no! He asked again. I sat him down and explained to him that we will no longer be watching T.V. all day. I suggested he read his books and to my surprise he said "Okay Mommy!" As I got breakfast done I peeked around the corner and there were my kids filling their time with books and playing together. Everyday got easier. I never knew that by simply leaving the remote on the shelf we would see a whole new world. The difference it has made in our home has been incredible. The quality time we have as a family now is so different and has brought a new sense of happiness. Zion reads more, he is able to focus on doing other things like counting or helping Mommy. He asked me the other day if he could help me clean, so I taught him how to clean a little. He asks to do things like color and paint. He asks if he can share with his Brother. Not to mention, Folks he is potty trained!!! There is not a single doubt in my mind that the T.V. was creating a laziness within him. We have been trying to potty train for the last year and it has been the most frustrating experience of my life. As soon as I turned off the T.V. he was potty trained within ONE DAY!!! It has been amazing. Don't get me wrong we are not perfect, it has been a fight and it has been hard but I have realized that the fight is not in dealing with what to do next without the T.V. the fight is for my kids and who they will become and the life they will lead! We do reward Zion with a good childrens Movie every once in awhile, but he has to earn it. He is learning how to work hard to earn the things that he wants and I have seen a change in him and his daily activities because of it. I am so grateful for the mentorship we receive from TEAM and all the wonderful doors it has opened up for our family! Thank You Terri!
I found this the other day...How sad...But so very true in our society! We will hear our children always and by doing so I know our Dreams for them will come true!!!

Questions anyone?

Have you ever asked hard questions? Either to yourself or others?

Not just, "Where we eatin' tonight hunny?" Which, I know, can be really hard sometimes. Or even, "What are we gonna erase from the DVR to make room for the latest humongous time waster Reality Show?" I still can't get over that a concern like that plagued my household..."What TV shows are we going to want to watch REPEATEDLY?" "Let's be sure not to erase those."-I am talking about deep probing questions that shake you out of apathy. The kind of questions that don't really have a quick answer, because maybe you have never been asked it before. I have been asked a lot of those questions over the last few months. And my response has been a huge mouth gaping....Ummmmmm.....I don't know!?...

I wanna talk about hard questions.

Let me ask one first. This is the question I asked myself on a flight home from Louisville this weekend. How much do I love my wife Dorothy? Let me repeat it...How much do I love my wife? Seems easy enough right? A lot! I love her a lot! Too easy.

Next question I asked myself... Do I love my wife enough to do things I don't wanna do to get her the lifestyle she deserves? Read it again. I'll wait... Little harder that one see. (here's a little justification) 'but Tony...you work 50 hours a week at a job you don't like doing to provide money for your family.' or, 'if you work 60 hours a week you can get that promotion that will provide a better lifestyle for your family.' Here's the problem...The lifestyle my wife wants has nothing to do with MONEY! It has everything to do with time.

As I look at the corporate structure in my current industry I see one constant. As you move up the corporate ladder you get more money but you get less time. What awaits me as a lifetime employee is trading dollars for my most precious commodity...Time. My director doesn't work less than me, he works more. Even my VP's car is there when i get to work in the morning and there when I leave. The main difference between me and my VP is 20 years in the business and a few more $$$. Being self-employed is even worse. You get to trade even more time AND you get to bring your job home with you. Don't believe me? Ask a doctor or a lawyer, two very prestigious titles in the self-employed category, how much they work and if they bring work home with them.

You can have more time you just have to give up $$$. You can have more $$$ just give up more time. Overtime. Time and a Half. 2nd job. 3rd job. We know nothing of a different option because this is all we were taught. People pay tons of money to good schools to teach them the same thing. I know this because my wife did. She is amazing at cutting and coloring hair. Best I have ever seen. She can go out and make more money for our family she just has to take that time away from our family.

My point is this. It's not about the money. It's about the time. And a two week vacation every year doesn't cut it. If you haven't read Kiyosaki's Cashflow Quadrant, read it. There is another way to make money. A way in which you get both time and money.

I've seen it and it has forced me to ask myself hard questions. Am I willing to do something foreign to me for a shortwhile to give my wife here husband back and my children thier father back. How many times does Zion have to hold on to my leg as I leave for work and say, "Daddy, it's my turn today."

Simply put, I didn't know what I didn't know. I didn't even know it. People have figured out how to have both time and money and they were willing to show me how. All that is left is to DO! and guess what. I love my wife enough.

Keep Moving Forward!

If you have not seen this movie, take the time to see it! The message is incredible and the movie is super cute! Ask yourself...How often do we focus on the things of the past? How often do those things keep us from progressing forward? How often do those things make us lose Faith in ourselves and all Hope for a brighter future? I don't know about you but this happens to Tone and I, we are only human and letting go is sometimes one of the hardest things you can do. But on the other hand letting go can also be one of the greatest things you can do for yourself and those around you no matter how hard it may be! If we wake up every morning putting one foot in front of the other and take each breath during the day you will eventually let it go. Who knows how long it may take just Keep Moving Forward, it will come! And never lose Faith in yourself and most importantly never lose Faith in the Lord!


At the end of the movie, Meet the Robinsons, they end with a quote that we hold close to our hearts...

Around here, However, we don't look

backwards for very long...

We Keep Moving Forward,

opening new doors and doing new things,

because we are curious...And Curiosity keeps

leading us down new paths!

Walt Disney

Keep Moving Forward...You never know where your path will lead if you only let yourself progress! The Sky is the Limit!!! Don't hold yourself back! One of my fave quotes..."Remember the Future, For the Past cannot be changed, but the Future is yours to Create!" -Larry Curtis

I'm sorry...Do my dreams make you uncomfortable?

Loved ones can attest. It's no secret. Dorothy and I are...well...a little irreverent. We call it, 'Square Peg/Round Hole Syndrome'. We have always gone against the herd. Always marched to the beat of our own drum. Bucked conventionalism!...so to speak.

We call it SPECIAL! We call it UNIQUE! We goal set. We dream build. We cast clear visions of our future so we KNOW where we are going. We are optimistic. We are hopeful.
NEWSFLASH: We haven't always been this way.

All who agree and want to make their voice heard please join us in building this blog. Remember...If you don't know where you are going any road will take you there!!

This blog will be a place of applicable optimisim. Real world advice and stories for real people. We will not sugar coat but we make no apologies. While the rest of the world continues to tear us down, we will build each other up. Remember...whether you think you can or you think you can't, your right.

A Blog in the Making!

We have started a new journey in our life! One that has already changed our lives dramatically! We are currently working on this blog and have lots to post! So please bear with us and stay tuned!!